New Years "Resolutions" Reality Check "Resolution", as defined as: a resolve or determination: to make a firm resolution to do something.

New Years "Resolutions" Reality Check

"Resolution", as defined as: a resolve or determination: to make afirm resolution to do something.

 How are you doing? No, really. Search deep down and be honest with yourself. How are you doing? We are now at the second last week of January and being January 23rd, we're either onto new habits or back to the old ones. Research shows it takes 21 days to break a habit. Did you lose faith in yourself? Have you been focused on your strengths or weaknesses? Did you set realistic goals? Are they YOUR goals or mirror of someone else's? Did you develop a plan? Did you set up a reward system for yourself? Did you visualize them or "just go for it"? It's NOT too late. Dust yourself off and get back at it again. Set yourself up for a "win-win" because you deserve every happiness in the world. Do not wait for next year to make a resolution. Dig deep and the time for whatever you want to change is NOW. Tomorrow is never promised to us. Heck, the next hour isn't even promised to us. We can set out on our routine, walk out the door and "smack", get hit by a car. Dramatic effect? No, reality. We never know what course or direction our lives are meant to take but wouldn't you rather make every day worth the day that you want to live and make good habits? No more negative self-talk or doubt. Are you tired of the same patterns? Tired of talking yourself out of things "oh, I can't do this" or "I always suck at this" "I'll never change". Time to start talking yourself into it instead of out of it. Wouldn't you rather be proud of yourself? There is nothing wrong with being your own cheerleader.

Ok...now go get lined paper or open up your Microsoft Word doc. Really...go get it and let's commit by writing this down. Lock yourself up for at least 10 minutes of total solitude and no disruptions. Hide in the bathroom if you need to. Right now, YOU'RE important.


STEP 1.
The first step in breaking old habits is deciding what new habits you want to create with your life energy. Start asking yourself these questions:


* What do you want your life to look like?
* What habits do you need to eliminate?
* What positive habits do you need to develop to make your life look like you want it to look?

These desires must be realistic and obtainable. What is your intuition telling you about what you should be doing?

Listening to your intuition is one of the most intelligent things you can ever do with your life energy. Your intuition always guides you in the direction that is perfect for you. It is that small voice that is not affected by egos, past failures, or other people?s opinions. It is your inner guiding light.

In your journal, keep notes on what your intuition tells you about the strategies and the resources that might empower you.

STEP 2.
Crystallize your thinking. Determine what specific goals you want to achieve.


What habits are you letting go? 

What habits are you creating in place of the old ones?

Your goals need to be specific, measurable, and realistic.

To do this you'll have to avoid  thinking like this: "I want to lose weight." What does that really mean? For your subconscious mind to be able to serve you it must receive very specific directions.

STEP 3.
Develop a sincere desire for the things you want.Desire is the starting point for all achievement. It's the greatest motivator of every human action.

Frequently, your mind is more motivated by pictures and visualization than it is with words and written exercises. The right side of your brain is where your creativity comes from, and it thrives on pictures. Many times the right side of your brain takes precedence over the left side, which thrives on words. In the past, you may have just written words down to reach your goals. Add this new dimension to your process.

Draw, cut out pictures, or take photographs of what you want in life. Put pictures up on your refrigerator, your bathroom mirror, on your smartphone, on your laptop, iPad, create a private photo album on Facebook or any place that will remind your subconscious mind of your desires to reinforce your goal.
Every thought you have uses electrical energy to imprint a new picture in your subconscious mind. The efforts of your subconscious mind are to match the pictures in your mind with reality.

The more you deliberately plant pictures of what you want, the faster you will attract it into your life. It's very important that you allow yourself to fantasize about what you want in your life - let your imagination run wild! This way, when you see the pictures so often, when you close your eyes you can see them. Create a reality. 
To achieve what it is you want in life, you must think about it. There are no limits except those we put on ourselves. This is your life and you're only cheating yourself. You can tell people that you're succeeding at achieving your goal but if you're truly not...you're cheating and hurting yourself. No one else. You must feel your success before you can manifest it in reality.


STEP 4.
Develop a plan for achieving your goal, and a deadline for its attainment. The difference between a "wish" and a "goal" is that the goal is written down. Once you have a clear picture of what you want in life, your subconscious and conscious mind can work together to achieve it.


When you prioritize and focus you can literally see what you want; this gives you the power of concentration. Deliberate concentration is like a laser beam - it can cut through any obstacles in your path.


STEP 5.
Distinguish between goals and activities. A goal is the specific end result you want to manifest in your life. Activities are those things you do to achieve your goals.


Use the skill of awareness, and remember the goal. Don't get stuck in the activities.


STEP 6.
Create deadlines for your goals. 
Without deadlines your brain doesn't have a clear picture of what you want created. Deadlines have a magical way of motivating us to produce results.


First write your *one-year* goals on paper, then write down all the activities you will have to do to reach each goal.


Start by asking yourself what is the very first activity I must do to get started on this goal? Then write down each following activity that will take you closer to the one year goal.

STEP 7.
Break down the activities for each goal into 3 month groups. Ask yourself "What are the activities I must do in the first three months to achieve my goal?" Write those down.

Then think about the activities you'll need to follow up in the following three months. By breaking down the goals into manageable, bite-size pieces, you'll feel more in control.

The secret is that this divide-and-conquer approach keeps achieving your goals from becoming overwhelmingly complicated.


STEP 8.
Make YOUR goals YOURS.

Time for a reality check. Don't set a goal for yourself that your spouse (or anyone else for that matter) wants for you. Revise your current goals to ensure they REALLY meet YOUR needs, not someone else's desires for you. You will never be successful achieving goals that are not motivated by your own desires. Moreover, don't compare your goals with other people's goals - you'll always come up short. The reality is that we usually compare our worst traits with someone else's best traits and we can never win that way.


Thanks for viewing! As always, have a great day and remember to "Empower yourself and inspire change in others" Wishing you much success in health, wealth and happiness.....

Power of Forgiving, Forgetting & Becoming Wonder Woman

How often have we heard “forgive and forget”. Because you see, “to error is being human.” Of course we’re human and we are bound to make mistakes so small miniscule things are easy to overlook and forgive but what about those times when someone has intentionally done something to you (and your family) for their own selfish, childish gain? Not hurting you in the physical bullying sense but has altered your life so drastically that in that one split second that you have your head in the clouds thinking everything is ok, you receive a phone call, have a meeting and find yourself in the hotseat defending accusations that are just simply not true.

If you know anything about me, my history and have been following my blogs…I’m about ethics and moral character. Not moral character where I judge people, this is wrong. I’m not perfect and just because I choose to live my life one way or believe there’s something in the Universe that watches over us to protect us does not mean it’s right but what works for me. And also, I believe, “judge not, lest you be judged” because I totally believe in Karma and what goes around -comes around so if you put bad stuff out there, it will come back to you in tri-fold. Put good stuff out there and it will come back to you in greatness.

Enough of the history. Apparently as humans we must forgive and move on. One, because of the many negative emotions and physiologically things it does to our bodies. If we’re forever holding onto a grudge then we’re also holding onto the past. Meanwhile, the person that you’re holding this grudge on has probably not given it another thought and their lives have moved on…so why should we stay back and dwell on it? Because that’s what we tend to do.

Are you a believer that everything happens for a reason? If not, perhaps you should. Let’s draw on my personal experience of being in the hotseat.

Whatever happened that day, I still not know what I did or said to that person to make them conjure up the lie they told and presented to the friend I was defending myself to. Looking back, any “friend” that calls you one, should truly know you and what kind of character you are. Anyway, the events that day left me stunned, hurt and affected not only me and changing my course and direction in life, but my family. You know that mama cubs are protectors so it was with that anger that actually moved in because that person’s lie went well above me at that point. I digress. It’s been about 4 years and someone from that inner circle has moved back in my life. I received an email and though I thought I had moved on all those feelings rushed back at me like the event was yesterday. So do we truly “forgive and forget”? Honestly, no we don’t so let’s be honest with ourselves. However, we do have choices and this is what I have learned:

the physiological effects of that negativity from someone else does not affect me anymore
I’m actually GRATEFUL!! Yes, that’s right, you read correctly. I’m truly, 100% grateful. Like I said before “everything happens for a reason” and though I could not see it through the feelings of devastation at the time I did what was necessary. Brushed myself off, took direction and what was necessary to take care of my family and moved on. What I THOUGHT was supposed to be my direction was actually hurting and limiting me and now my wings have spread even wider in a total 180 direction I never thought possible. New opportunities have presented themselves almost every day….some even beyond my wildest imagination.
guess what…I WIN! That’s right. After all these years I didn’t begrudge so whatever little satisfaction you had in giving your performance and lie was a waste. I’ve seen photos around with your smile and I believe that you get to carry your dishonesty around with you. Guess what? When I look in the mirror, the peace is a luxury knowing I truly stand with moral character…no fakeness behind my smiles
Ok, this post was long overdue. Probably one of the most personal but had to put it out there. When you’re in a City, it still doesn’t seem that big because of all the inner circles and bound to run into that person which I finally did. I did not put my head down or scowl. In fact, I did nothing but hold my head high and listen in silence as I waited my turn in line at the cashier. I could feel her nervousness and awkwardness and always wondered how I would react when I saw her again. Nothing.

I feel peace and contentment. Have I forgiven and forgotten? Obviously one can’t really forget about life altering events in life but I’m not dwelling on it. It actually was character-building, has opened my eyes to the true friends and network I allow in my inner circle and altered my life course and work in another direction that is actually better. As far as forgiveness, I actually feel sorry and empathy….how’s that for a change of events? Not sorry in the “apologetic sense” but how sad that there’s this deep down core of unsettling as a direct result of her actions. It was evident by the physiological signs she displayed when she saw me. So the forgiveness part is within herself and something she’ll have to deal with.

The Spirit or “inner voice” is always whispering something in our ears. What does yours tell you? If you have any unsettlement in your life, deal with it so you too can close the door on any negativity and be able to move on and embrace the great things that are destined for you to have. So that is my rant for the day and hopefully, this chapter can now come to a close. So people I have not seen since that day and happen to run into me again…don’t have to apologize or feel awkward because they’re friends and please don’t keep trying to suck me back into the past. It’s happened. It’s over. Newsflash, it’s been about 4 years and I’ve moved on. I’m ok and didn’t go sulk in the corner and this person didn’t have the power to influence my life into devastation.

Anyone reading this, I hope that whatever situation you have experienced in your life….you shift the power back to you. Don’t let the feeling of devastation hold you back and do your best to claw your way back up, eyes wide open and don’t let yourself be stabbed in the back again. That’s character-building and you’ll be stronger and more capable of handling any other mud slinging that may come your way! I promise you that! So, let’s be Wonder Women together and deflect all that negativity and bring contentment into our lives which is what we truly deserve and much more ful-filling anyway!

Wish you all the best in health, wealth and happiness always.